I've found myself in a bit of a slump that past few days/weeks. I am not sure exactly what it is, but I am not feeling happy. I have no reason not to be happy, but I am not...and I am not sure why. Maybe it is just the stress of work, the holiday, and not having my competition body right now. I also had a bit of a set back with some vacation arrangements, but those have since cleared up and eased some of my stress. I probably just need a vacation!!!

My competition season is quickly approaching and I am getting a bit nervous about that also. I dont know if I will be competing in the WNBF or the IFPA organization. It really sucks being a new PRO competitor and then being thrown the loop of changing organizations....especially since I dont fully understand all this in the first place....my first competition ever was in October of 2007, then last year I competed nine times...with the NANBF, it isnt like I ever relaxed enough to learn the in and outs of the organizations....I really feel lost.

I was in control when I knew what was going on and what was expected of me, now I am lost and have no idea of what I need to do.....I am most likely over reacting, because that is just who I am, but I like to have everything planned out and organized...and right now I have no idea when my first competition in 2009 will be....I think that is what is really weighing on me....not knowing.

Okay enough ranting for today....I need to cook some healthy food and get myself back in the game...I know I am competing with PRO's in 09, so I need to train and eat like a PRO!!!! That is something to work with, something I know, something that is in concrete!!!!

Black Friday

OMG, what a long day!!! I missed my workout, but at least I got all my Christmas shopping done!! I did a lot of walking too, so I guess that accounts for something, right? Well I am going to count it.

I expected the shopping to be insane today but it wasnt, thank god!! I got everything on my must have list and then some, but at least I am finished....broke, but finished!

I will be doing my missed workout tomorrow at some point in time...I also have to dig out and put up the Christmas tree and lights.....on top of cleaning the house and doing laundry...O the tasks never end!! O-well I guess it keeps me busy and moving which helps to keep my bodyfat down! LOL!!!

Hope everyone had a fantastic Turkey day....I sure did. I ate way to much!!! So for me it is back to 100% clean eating and workouts on Monday. I am getting fluffy and I dont want to get so fluffy that I need a whole new wardrobe!!!

Okay enough for today, I am beat!!! Have a wonderful night!!

12/25/2009

I am really tired today, not looking forward to going to work, but what choice do I have...need to work in order pay for competition and my trainer! LOL!!! Plus there are only two more days in the workweek thank goodness!!

Not much substantial to say today.

I have shoulders at the gym today and I cant wait for that. I really wish working out was my job...wouldnt that be a dream.....maybe some day. But I doubt it!!

Okay off to that dreaded job of mine!!!

Goal in site

Since it is a new week I have decided that I need a goal to set for myself. I am so used to having a comp to prepare for that right now I have lost my motivation. Well I have found it. I am just over a month away from a girls trip to Vegas...so that is my new goal. That is my motivation, to look good in Vegas! Who wants to go to sin city looking fat....no we all want to go there looking hot and flawless...so there it is, there is, my new motivation!!!! Vegas Baby!!!!